dear baby. post 31.

nov. 30, 2013

dear baby,

i thought for sure you would be here by now but you are just taking your time, aren’t you? it’s okay. i can wait. but i hope i don’t have to wait too much longer. i want to meet you!

these past few weeks have been fairly long. waiting for your due date made things go by very slowly and every day since your due date has been even longer. i had a little bit of an upsetting dr. appt last monday. the midwife measured my belly and was concerned that you aren’t growing as much as you should. i was at the appt. by myself and this was very disheartening to hear but i had to make sure to remember everything so i could tell your dad. i got an ultrasound and they measured your whole body and everything looked good. your belly was measuring a little smaller than it should but i know that everything will be just fine. my amniotic fluid levels were also low so i had to do a non-stress test to make sure that your heart is nice and strong. of course it is, because you are a my little angel and everything is going to be perfect.

the ride home from my appt. was really tough. i cried, well, sobbed, the whole way home because i was just so scared that something could possibly be wrong. i talked to your dad and grammy and took a little nap and eventually felt a little better about things. i just want everything to be perfect. i want you to be perfect, little one. and i feel so helpless at times! your dad came home and gave me a blessing and i know that everything will be just fine.

i went to the hospital on friday and got another non-stress test just to be sure that everything looks good. i passed with flying colors and hopefully you will come before monday so that i don’t have to take another one on monday. i would rather be holding you in my arms!

it was your dad’s birthday on tuesday. it was a good day. i started working from home so i was able to make him breakfast and hang out with him for a bit before he went to work. i got him a nice coat that he opened in the morning and then when he got off work, we met up at papa and grandma porters house for pizza and more presents. this time he opened some new basketball shoes. i think he had a good birthday but he was hoping that he would be able to get a baby as a present! come on, babe! we are ready for you!

thanksgiving was good. we were at the porters again. it was a great day filled with a lot of food and naps and me feeling anxious. i started to get things together for the hospital stay. that is something i have been putting off until i was in labor but i was feeling so antsy that i started to gather things already. i may regret doing that later but i might be grateful if my labor ends up being really fast.

i have officially stopped answering peoples questions about if you have made an appearance yet. not because i want to be rude or am annoyed with them, but i feel like i am getting a little stressed out trying to keep everyone informed about what is going on. they will all know soon enough!

i have been having a lot of pains the past couple of days so i am sure i am progressing more. i am anticipating my water breaking at any minute and feel a little on edge every time i have a contraction. i just love you so much, little one and i want to hold you in my arms so badly. i know you will come when you are ready to come, but i sure hope that you decide to come soon. you daddy and i cannot wait to meet you. it has been a long 10 months of waiting. waiting a few more days for you is totally doable, but please baby, don’t make us wait much longer than that!

we love you so much.

love,

mama.