on your first birthday.

dec. 3, 2014

dear milo,

one year ago on a cold december night, you were born. the sky was black and the valley was welcoming the first big storm of winter. your perfect body was laid on my chest and i was in awe of you. you looked at me with your deep gray eyes and i knew you. we knew each other, my boy, we knew each other because this was not our first time meeting, it was just a reunion. one we had been anticipating for a very long time.

one year ago, your daddy cried as he held you and my love for both of you multiplied infinitely. you were finally here. you were finally in our arms and we are never letting go. you have filled a hole in our hearts that we didn’t know was there. from the very first time i held you, holding you in my arms has felt so natural, like it is what my arms were made for.

over the past year, you have grown so much. from learning to hold your head up, to rolling over, to scooting, to crawling, to walking, to running. milo, you are amazing. your vocabulary may be limited, but somehow, i always know what you are in need of. your toothy smile can warm my soul even on the most difficult days. the way you lean in for a kiss and lay your head on my shoulder are things straight out of my dreams.

this past year has been filled with learning for your dad and i as well. we have learned how to love differently, deeply, more completely. we have learned to be more patient, more understanding, more humble, more prayerful, more loving, more selfless, more caring, more present. you have taught us all of those things and so much more, my boy.

one year ago, at 7:32pm you were born and in that same breath i was born. i was born to be your mother and when that moment finally came, i was scared and unsure, but we figured it out together. you are a piece of my own heart, living outside of my body. you have blessed my life in ways i could never begin to describe.

milo, i love you. forever, my baby.

happy first birthday.

love,

mama.